Can a Father “Give a Baby Up” for Adoption?

Because the birth mother is the one who experiencing the unplanned pregnancy, the adoption process often centers on her. But as the birth father, you can play an important part in the adoption process if you choose to do so. 

Facing an unplanned pregnancy can be incredibly overwhelming. If you’ve never gone through the adoption process before, you might not be sure where to start. We’re here to help.  

You likely have a lot of questions running through your head about how adoption works and how to determine if it’s the right choice for you. You can continue reading below, or reach out to an adoption professional today who can help fathers that “give up” their child for adoption. 

Can a Father Put a Child Up for Adoption? 

Yes. There are many birth fathers that “give their child up” for adoption. You will be able to help the birth mother create an adoption plan for your child. Your adoption professional will be there to help you navigate this process. If you feel that adoption is what’s best for your child in this difficult situation, you are making a selfless choice. 

You will be able to choose adoption for your child with the birth mother, regardless of whether or not you are in a relationship. Having each other’s support during this time will be incredibly important. You will be able to encourage each other navigate emotions together.  

This teamwork will not only benefit the two of you, but also your child in the long run. Your child will grow up knowing that you chose adoption for them out of love and wanting to give them an amazing life. 

How Can a Father Put a Child Up for Adoption? 

As a birth father, you will be able to work with the birth mom to create an adoption plan. This process looks like: 

  1. Choosing an adoption professional. You and the birth mother will want to sit down and figure out what you want from your adoption process, and then choose an adoption agency that can meet your needs. 
  1. Choose the adoptive family. When you find the adoption professional you want to work with, you and the birth mother will be able to create an adoption plan together. Part of this adoption is deciding what kind of family you want to adopt your child.  You will be able to look at adoptive family profiles of families that match your preferences until you find the perfect match. 
  1. Get to know the adoptive family. Once you have found a family that resonates with you and the birth mother, your adoption professional will arrange a mediated conference call where you can get to know one another and ask questions. After this, you will be able to stay in touch throughout the birth mother’s pregnancy, and even meet in person if you feel comfortable doing so. 
  1. Complete the adoption. On the big day, once your baby has been born, you and the birth mother will need to sign the appropriate paperwork, relinquishing your parental rights. Some states have a revocation period, but in most cases, this cannot be undone.  
  1. Post-placement contact. Most adoptions today are open. This means you and the baby’s birth mother will be able to stay in touch with your child and the adoptive family after the adoption is complete. This contact can look like: 
  • Texts and calls 
  • Emails 
  • Social media 
  • Video chats 
  • In-person visits 

This contact allows you to be involved in your child’s life, and they’ll never have to wonder about their adoption story. Open adoption can be nerve-wracking at first, but there are numerous ways that it benefits the birth parents and the adoptee.  

If you and the baby’s mother choose an open adoption, you will not be expected to take on parental roles or responsibilities. All it means is that you’ll be able to watch your child grow up and know that they are happy and healthy with their adoptive family. 

Can a Birth Father Choose Adoption without the Birth Mother’s Consent? 

Birth fathers that give up their child for adoption want what’s best for their child. But what if the baby’s mother disagrees? Can a father put a child up for adoption without the mother’s consent? 

In most cases, the answer is no. Reasons you might be considering adoption without the permission of the birth mother is: 

  • You and the birth mother have an unhealthy relationship 
  • You might not be willing or able to raise the child with the baby’s mother 
  • The birth mom is incarcerated 
  • You just feel that adoption is the best way to give your child an amazing life 

These are all valid reasons to consider adoption for your baby. So, what are your options? 

  • Talk to an adoption professional. They can provide you with further education on adoption that you can pass on to the birth mother. She may just need more information before making any decisions. 
  • Talk to the birth mother about adoption and why you feel it’s best for the baby. 
  • Talk to an adoption attorney if you believe that the birth mother could be a danger to the child, or if you believe she has abandoned the child. 

If you’re a birth father wondering “Can a father put a child up for adoption?” there’s an adoption agency that can help you and the birth mother begin the adoption process. Reach out to an adoption professional today to get the assistance you need. 

About the Author

Lindsay Arielle has been a proud birth mother since placing her son for adoption in 2011. Her post-placement agreement has always been an open adoption. She loves the time she gets to spend with her son and his parents during visits. Lindsay truly believes that for herself and her family, adoption has been a blessing, and she enjoys writing about spiritual healing for birth mothers.

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